Wednesday, May 25, 2011

No Expectations = No Disappointments

I was sitting in my car this morning listening to my local radio station (doing all I can not to walk in to my job LOL) when I heard an interview that was done a few days ago. I'm not sure if the guy they were talking to was a relationship expert or anything, but he said something that really stood out to me. He said that relationships between men and women struggle so much because we put too much expectations on each other. He then went on to say if women want someone who will be as emotional, caring, and gentle as themselves then they might as well get a woman. And if a man wants someone who will be laid back and nonchalant with little to no drama like themselves then they may as well be with a man. Why? Because women and men are nothing alike.

Now that may sound crazy, but I think he is 100% correct. Before ya'll get yours panties in a bunch lol, let me make clear in no way am I say we all should just jump up and convert our sexuality to same sex.  Not gonna happen over here. What I'm saying is, maybe we ARE expecting too much from our partners. Of course everyone wants their significant other (bf/gf, husband/wife, play thing of the week, etc) to be PERFECT. You can deny this all you want, but it's true. We want our partner to do absolutely everything we ask, exactly how we want it, and right then and there. We want them to jump the moon and come back down for us in 10 minutes. This is fine and dandy until they start expecting the same thing back, and what happens when you can't deliver as expected?

Everything works fine this way until we come to the realization that perfection does not exist. When you're seeing someone you have to consider that sometimes people have bad days, people go through things, and they just switch up sometimes for no reason at all. Keep in mind that no matter how much you know someone, you never really KNOW everything they go through. Not only that but things also come up regularly, so schedules change and plans may have to get cancelled. These things sound like common sense but they can really become a problem in a relationship when there's too many expectations involved. I for one am so guilty of this! It's kind of like you get your hopes up (expecting something), something comes up (imperfection), then you get irritated (disappointment). BUT when the roles are reversed you EXPECT understanding and compassion LOL, I think we have the game twisted because I know it doesn't work like that. And I'm positive I'm not the only one guilty of this!

All I'm saying is when you're dealing with someone you care about, it's best to bring the expectations down a notch. That will prevent a lot of arguments, time wasted, and misunderstandings. Try putting yourself in the other person's shoes before getting upset. If the shoe was on the other foot, you would want them to understand where you're coming from, so do the same for them. It's okay to have some expectations in a relationship, but when you start to expect too much is when the problems arise. If you're REALLY ready to ride until the wheels fall off then take the good with the bad, be realistic with what you expect, and stop thinking your boo is Jesus :)

QOTD: "Take me as I am, I'll take you as you are. Then we can work on US together"

LaBellaBoss <3

1 comment:

  1. This just opened my eyes! I admit I am gulity of this. Now I can work on being more understanding and not having too many expectations! Thanks girl!