Tuesday, May 31, 2011

Playing Your Position VS. Playing Dumb


Oprah & Stedman have never been married and are still
going strong... #playingtheirposition

I don't know if it's just me or does it seem like relationships barely exist nowadays?? I won't go into the whole title thing because that brings up a whole other discussion, but hear me out on this. I only know a handful of people who are actually in a committed relationship with someone and their relationship is public. Everyone else falls into a category that I like to call "arrangements". I consider "arrangements" to be those people who keep their relationship on the low, whether it may be to keep everyone out of their business or because they're doing all they can lol. This leads me to ask, when it comes to "playing your position" do you play it well or do you just play dumb?

I'm pretty sure that more people fall into the "arrangement" category over having an actual relationship. Like I said before, it could be for various reasons and I think the reason alone lets you know if you're playing dumb or actually playing your position. Say for instance you two have a lot going on so you can't be serious like you want to; or you know people will try to bring drama into your relationship if made public; or maybe there's an understanding between you two that makes everything work out without having an actual relationship... if this is the case then by all means you're playing your position and you're probably doing a good thing by leaving it that way until you're both ready to make that move. As long as you feel like you're getting the respect you deserve and you're not constantly stressing over what the other person is doing, then by all means do you! But we know this isn't the case in plenty of circumstances...

On the other hand we have the people who just can't seperate the two and continue to play dumb. These are the people you find staying true to a man/woman but not getting the same in return. And to top it all off there's usually nothing that they can do about it because they're not even in a real relationship. This gives the other person the opportunity to throw in the "we're not together" excuse every time they get caught up in something. Obviously ya'll aren't together, that's the whole point of the "arrangement", but when it comes to a point that they don't consider your feelings or remotely show interest in keeping you happy then you're playing dumb #justsaying.

You can always tell when a person truly cares by the way they act. We all know people can talk a good game, but few can back it up. If you're constantly wondering why this person isn't hitting you up, or why you two only get to spend time together when it's convenient for them then you might want to reevaluate your situation. It's all about understanding your role in the relationship. When you both know the deal then it's usually less problems. Of course other people looking in may tell you that you're playing dumb, but having that understanding SHOULD eliminate all doubts. Now on the other hand, when you don't really know where you two stand and you're not receiving any respect then that's a different story. Try talking to that person to get a clear mindstate about what you're doing and where you're going with the relationship. If you bring up the issue and they can't give you any direct answers or if they make the situation seem less than what it is, I promise you're playing dumb #letitgo....

No one wants to think they're playing dumb for a male or female, so instead of being blind to the fact... address it. If you find out you're getting played, so what? At least you found out. I'd rather find out now than get serious later and STILL be looking dumb. By then you'll be making all kinds of excuses as to why you should stay. Stop thinking your boo's is slate is as clean as baby Jesus' and open your eyes. Be Bossy NOT Basic! ;)

XOXO,
LaBellaBoss


Diddy got Kim and Cassie #playingdumb lol

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